It hasn’t even been a full week, and I
already have an update on my ring situation.
I’ve been nagging “My Guy” off and on since
July about my ring. Recently I upped my nagging to daily nagging. The daily
nagging resulted in an “adult conversation” about my phantom ring. OH BOY did so much come to surface.
“My Guy” asked me directly what kind of
ring do I want, and how much does it cost. I proceeded to tell him about this “one”
ring that I saw at “this store” in NJ. “That ring” cost “this much.”
I told him about the ring that I saw “online” that costs “that much.”
I paused for a second mid sentence to go into the other room to get my cell phone. I needed to show him the new gallery of pictures that I updated within the past few weeks.
I told him about the ring that I saw “online” that costs “that much.”
I paused for a second mid sentence to go into the other room to get my cell phone. I needed to show him the new gallery of pictures that I updated within the past few weeks.
After I presented “My Guy” with an option
of 10-15 rings……AND texted him my “top
5” choices he was quiet in deep thought. I assumed he was processing it all. It
was then that I realized that I may have given him too much information at
once.
Seven or eight seconds go by and he says, “you
don’t really wear rings or lots of jewelry.” I said, “yeah I know, but I will
wear this ring every single day.” He says, “I don’t doubt that, but this type
of stuff isn’t really that important to you. You’re more interested in jump
starting your new career. I’m going to give you a ring, we both know that, but
you can’t even decide on the style, the stone, or the metal. This just isn’t
you. You’re the type of person that when you’re sure about something you stick
with it.”
The conversation did not stop there. He
went on to remind me why we postponed the wedding. We talked about how the
wedding was consuming our lives. We are both in this socially awkward phase so
the wedding was getting the best of both of us. This conversation allowed me to
see that once again “peer pressure” was getting the better of me. By postponing
the wedding, “My Guy” and I, were intending to be true to ourselves. Sometimes
that may mean going against society.
I realized my reasoning for wanting this
ring RIGHT RIGHT RIGHT NOW was
based on my ego and embarrassment. I had one too many encounters where a person
made me feel like “your’re getting married, yeah right where’s your ring??” Now
I was taking everything out on “My Guy” when in actuality it wasn’t a HUGE
deal.
“My Guy” and I came to terms with what
made sense for us. We both were able to talk through our feelings about wedding
rings. I’ve learned through life that when you talk out your feelings you can
discover things that you may not have known were there.
We realized that despite us both having a
liking for flashy things we’re really practical when it comes to the wedding
ring. We both felt some type of way after seeing the movie Blood Diamond. Having been traumatized enlightened we
we’re more open to all types of options.
In closing I recently saw a video on
Youtube that really summed up my feelings. I thought to myself “Tell Em’ Sister”
when the young woman described her story. We have similar feelings, especially about the movie Blood Diamond. I posted the video below. Enjoy!
Sincerely,
The
Anti-Bride 2013
Email:
theantibride2013@gmail.com
Twitter:
@theantibride2013
P.S.
F.Y.I. Here is the link to her YouTube Channel so you can follow her: http://www.youtube.com/user/EverythingLuxy
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