Cabbage Patch and Rings

     I was given a verbal job offer a little over two weeks ago. I'm UBER excited about it. I have been cabbage patching around my living room! My new employer is in the process of relocating. The present office space is extremely small; so they will not be able to officially bring me on until the middle or end of this month. I'm waiting to get the written offer letter via email sometime this week. Once I receive my first check you will probably catch me doing the tootsie roll like Ashley down there!!



Back to the Wedding Stuff!!

     What I am finding out more now than ever before is that saying you are engaged and not having a ring is a complete oxymoron. When I tell people I'm getting married the first thing they say is "where's your ring?" I ever so boldly always reply "I DON'T HAVE ONE!!" Then it all starts. You know what I'm talking about..... The judgement! Hence the spiciness in the my reply.

     The idea behind this topic, like the inspiration behind most of my wedding topics, started from a conversation that took place at my ahhheemmm former place of employment. The ladies in the office asked why I didn't have a ring. I said "uhh ... I don't know, we just didn't get one yet." 

     Mind you this whole "ring" conversation was followed behind the "proposal" conversation. In the proposal conversation I expressed that MY LOVE never officially proposed. In fact we just decided on a date.

     So my old boss, who you will soon find out never holds anything back, laid into me. She went on one of her I'm just saying rants where she just said..., "a man should give you a ring because the ring symbolizes something. The ring has meaning. It symbolizes that he's serious." She said some other stuff that I selectively decided to not hear. BUT I did hear how she ended her rant, and it went a little something like this, "I mean whatever he can afford even if it's the tiniest ring it shouldn't matter because it shows he cares."

                                       

                                                                    SHOTS!!

    

            

     As if the conversation was not painfully uncomfortable enough. So many things ran through my mind. I fumbled through a terrible defense which was that I lose jewelry, and blah..blah.. blah.. blah..... blah......blah. Me losing jewelry is true to some degree. Not so much in this case. It was too late anyways. The implications were already there. My former boss only ranted for about 45 seconds, but the content was so heavy.

     I naturally over analyze, rationalize, and categorize. That 15 minute conversation about my proposal, my wedding, my ring, etc etc etc (the etc etc etc will of course come to surface in other posts) left me feeling insecure. With time (which is the best therapy in my opinion) and alcohol I embraced being an anti-bride, and not having a ring.

     My Present State of Mind

     With all of that behind us I'm exploring ring options. I'm not to crazy about white gold. White gold is the "in" thing now, because it's the working man's platinum. My mom's been rocking a white gold wedding set since Michael Jackson's Off the Wall album debut.

     There is absolutely nothing wrong with white gold, but it's just not for me.

     Next there is yellow gold. To be quite honest, I do not know if I am secure enough as a woman to rock yellow gold either. Yellow gold is timeless to me. A beautiful yellow gold ring says classy, sassy, and everything in between. Bold, Gaudy, and Cheap can also fall in between classy and sassy. You have to be EXTRA careful when picking the style of a yellow gold ring. 

     So I am thinking about a custom made rose gold ring. My guy and I have decided we will travel to Midtown Manhattan (I love how I said travel like its a long trek or journey rather than a whole 12 miles from our house.) to the Diamond District in search for what I want. 

     That is the first step. The second step will be to see what the prices are, and if we can afford what I want. 
     
     The third and final step will be to analyze whether what I want is what we want to spend. If it is more we will just get what we can afford for now, and get the custom ring later on. 

Addressing What my OLD Boss Said

     What my old boss said definitely pissed me the (___blank___) off. She is very opinionated and judgmental. But so are 80% of people especially women. I took it as being rude classless, and hateful. But I can not escape the fact that what she said was true. But it was her truth which is a lot of people's truth.

     I said in my first post that I am different. I may look like everyone else, and have similar interest as the "normal" person BUT I am different. Maybe to my old boss, and a lot of other people, a ring symbolizes that her man is serious. Maybe to her a ring symbolizes what he can afford, and it shows that he cares. However, over here in "antibride land" the ring is just a piece of jewelry worn on the left hand fourth finger from the right if you count the thumb. For me the ring is special because it says I AM MARRIED  without me having to utter a word. The only reason why I want it to be pretty is because I have to wear it everyday.

sigh.......

     I just wish I was quicker on my toes and I could have told her that then.

     I want to close this post on a high note. Let's hear it for: PERSONAL GROWTH AND DEVELOPMENT.

Sincerely,

THE ANTI-BRIDE 2013